What can make a good parent?
A good parent is someone who strives to make choices in the best interest of the kid.
What makes a fantastic parent isn't only identified by the parent 's actions, but also the intention of theirs.
A good parent does not have to be ideal. Nobody is perfect. No child is ideal either … keeping this in mind is essential when we set our expectations.
Successful parenting isn't about achieving perfection. But it does not imply that we shouldn't work to that goal. Set very high standards for ourselves first and then the children of ours second. We serve as role models that are important for them.
Top Ten Parenting Tips
You'll be a better parent, if you stick to these 10 tips for parenting tips, and you will steer clear of bad parenting.
Not all of them tend to be that simple.
It's unlikely that anyone can do them all the time.
Even though you might not always do all of these things, but the suggestions in this parenting guide can help you move in the right direction.
#1 BE A good Role MODEL
Walk the walk. Don't just tell your child what you want them to do.
The best way to teach is to show them.
Human is a special species in part because we can learn by imitation. We are programmed to imitate others' actions, comprehend them, and integrate them in to our own. Children, in particular, watch everything their parents do very carefully.
So, be the individual you would like the child of yours to be - respect your kid, demonstrate to them good attitude and behavior, have empathy towards your kid's emotion - as well as your child will follow suit.
#2: Love THEM And Show them Through ACTION
Show the love of yours.
There's simply no such thing as loving the child of yours a lot of. To love them cannot spoil them.
Only what you choose to do (or give) in the title of love can - things like material indulgence, low expectation, leniency, and over protection. When these items are given in place of real love, that is when you will have a spoiled child.
Loving your child may be as easy as offering them hugs, spending quality time with them, having family meals together, and also listening to your child's problems seriously.
Showing these acts of love is able to trigger the release of feel-good hormones like oxytocin. These neurochemicals are able to bring us a deep feeling of calm, emotional warmth, and contentment; from these, the kid, will develop resilience and not to point out a closer relationship with you.
#3: Practice Kind And Firm POSITIVE PARENTING
Infants are born with around 100 billion brain cells (neurons) with relatively few connections. These connections create the thoughts of ours, drive our actions, shape our personalities, and essentially determine who we are. They are created, strengthened, and "sculpted" through life experiences.
Give the child of yours positive family interaction, especially in the beginning years. They will then be equipped to see positive experiences themselves and provide them to others.
But if you give your child bad experiences, they won't have the development type necessary for them to thrive.
Sing that silly song. Use a tickle marathon. Go to the park. Laugh with the child of yours. Give them good attention. Drive through an emotional tantrum with them. Solve an issue together with a positive mind-set.
These positive experiences produce good neural connections into your child's brain and form the memories individuals your child carries for life.
With regards to discipline, it seems difficult to remain positive, especially when dealing with behavior issues. But it is possible by using positive discipline and avoiding strong discipline.
Being a good parent means you need to teach the child of yours the morals of what is right and what's wrong.
Setting limits and being constant is the golden rule to discipline that is good. Be kind and firm when you establish rules and enforce them. Focus on the reason for the child's misbehavior. And allow it to be an opportunity for them to find out for the future in a good way, instead of to get penalized for the past.
#4: Be a Safe HAVEN FOR YOUR CHILD
Let your child realize that you will always be there for them by being responsive to your child's signals and vulnerable to the needs of theirs. Support and accept the child of yours as a person. Be a safe and warm place for the child of yours to explore from and go back to.
Children raised by parents that are constantly responsive tend to have better psychological regulation development, social skills development, and emotional health outcomes.
#5: Talk with The CHILD of yours And Help THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
Many of us know already the value of communication. Talk to the child of yours as well as listen to them carefully. By keeping an open line of communication, you'll have a better connection with the child of yours as well as your kid may come for you when there's a problem.
But there's another reason for communication. You help your child integrate different parts of their brain, a critical process in a child's development.
Integration is similar to our body, in which different organs must coordinate and work together to maintain a healthy body. When different parts of the brain are integrated, they can function harmoniously as a whole, which means less tantrums, much more good behavior, much more empathy, and much better psychological well-being.
To accomplish that, conversation through troubling experiences. Ask the child of yours to explain what happened and how they felt to develop attuned communication.
You don't need to offer solutions. You do not have to have all of the answers to be a good parent. Just listening to them talk. Ask clarifying questions using simple words will help them make sense of the experiences of theirs and integrate their memories.
#6: Reflect on Your own CHILDHOOD
Many of us want to parent differently from the parents of ours. Even people who had an excellent upbringing and a thankful childhood may want to alter several elements of how they had been brought up.
But very often, when we open the mouths of ours, we speak the same as the own parents of ours did.
Reflecting on the own childhood of ours is an action towards understanding why we parent the way we do. Make note of things you would like to change and think of just how you would get it done differently in a genuine scenario. Try to be aware and change your behavior the next time those issues come up.
Do not give up in case you do not succeed at first. It takes practice, lots of practice to consciously change one 's child-rearing methods.
#7: Pay attention to Your personal WELL-BEING
Parents need relief also.
Give consideration to your own well-being to prevent parental burnout.
Oftentimes, things such as the own needs of yours or the health of your marriage are placed on the back burner when a kid is born. If you don't take note of them, they will become bigger problems down the road. Take time to strengthen the relationship of yours with your spouse.
Stressed-out parents are more prone to fighting. Do not be afraid to ask for parenting assistance. Having some "me time" for self-care and stress management is important to revitalize the brain.
How parents take proper care of their child physically and mentally can make a big difference in their parenting and family life. If these two areas fail, your child is going to suffer, also.
#8: Don't SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
Undoubtedly, to some parents, spanking is able to bring about short term compliance which occasionally is a much needed relief for the parents.
Nevertheless, this method does not teach the child right from wrong. It only teaches the child to fear external consequences. The child is then motivated to stay away from getting caught with behavior that is inappropriate.
Spanking the child of yours is modeling to your kid that he/she is able to resolve issues by violence. A child who's spanked, smacked, or maybe hit is much more vulnerable to fighting along with other children. They are more apt to become bullies and to use verbal/physical aggression to solve disputes.
Later on in daily life, they're additionally more apt to lead to oppositional behavior and delinquency, worse parent child relationships, mental health problems, and domestic violence victims or abusers.
You will find an assortment of more effective options to discipline which have been proven to be more effective, such as positive discipline (Tip #3 above positive reinforcement and).
#9: Keep Things In Perspective And remember YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What's the goal of yours in raising a kid?
If you are like most parents, you want the child of yours to excel in school, be productive, be independent and responsible, be respectful, enjoy positive associations with you and some, be caring and compassionate, and have a happy, healthy and satisfying life.
Though how much time do you spend working towards those goals?
If you're like most parents, you probably spend the majority of the time just attempting to get through the day. As authors, Siegel and Bryson, point out in their book, The Whole Brain kid, instead of helping your kid thrive, spent most of time simply trying to survive!
To not let the survival mode dominate your life, next time you feel angry or frustrated, step back. Think about what anger and frustration will do for you or your child.
Rather, look for ways to switch each negative experience into a learning opportunity for them. Even epic tantrums can be turned into priceless brain sculpting moments in case you concentrate on teaching the child of yours, not trying to control them.
#10: Take a SHORTCUT By utilizing Findings In Latest PSYCHOLOGY And NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
By shortcuts, I don't mean shortchanging the child of yours with tricks. What I mean is taking advantage of what's already known by scientists.
Parenting is among the most researched fields in psychology. Lots of parenting strategies, practices, or traditions have been scientifically researched, verified, refined, or refuted.
For optimum parenting advice for increasing parentinghowto.com a child and information which are supported by science, here is one of my personal favorite science based parenting books, The Science of Parenting.
Using medical knowledge is of course not a one-size-fits-all strategy. Every kid differs. Even within the very best parenting style, there are able to be many different good parenting methods you can choose based on your child's temperament.
A very good example is using spanking to discipline. You will find numerous better alternatives, e.g. redirection, reasoning, time-in, etc. You are able to choose a non punitive discipline method that works ideal for your child.
Of course, you are able to also decide to use "traditional" or maybe "old school" parenting styles (e.g. punishing or maybe spanking) and might still buy a "similar" outcome.
Differential susceptibility has shown us that kids with different temperaments respond to the quality of parenting differently.
Those people who are more susceptible to parenting quality is going to have better outcomes under great parenting but even worse outcomes under bad parenting.
Those people who are less prone may "turn out fine" no matter how strong their parents treat them. But it does not mean those practices are great. These children are merely lucky. They could thrive despite bad parenting, not due to it.
Why take a chance with sub par parenting practices when you can use well-researched, better ones?
The value of parenting cannot be underestimated. Taking science based parental advice may not be the simplest way to parent. It may require more work on the part of yours in the short term but can help you save lots of time and agony in the long run.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The great thing is, that although parenting is difficult, it's also really rewarding. The bad part will be the rewards usually come later than the hard work. But if we try our best today, we'll eventually reap the rewards and also have absolutely nothing to regret.
To Happy Parenting!